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Es Una Cruz Bien Dura A Cargar

Story by Gabi Magaly

It is a very hard cross to carry.

I went back to San Luis Potosi for the first time in 14 years. A lot has changed since I've been to my grandma's home in Mexico. Seeing her use a walking cane and how much older she looks hit me hard because I didn't realize how much time has gone by. I've always wanted to convey the story of my strong abuelita who has gone through so much in life and to learn the stories of where I come from. Most of them were sad and hard to hear because I didn't want to think about what she went through with my grandfather. To see where she is now helps me understand why she is the way she is: independent, never asking for help when she clearly needs it, and stubborn. I photographed intimate moments between us, when she wasn’t paying attention, and self-portraits. I might never have kids, but I want the future generations in my family to understand how much this woman sacrificed for her family to be happy.

Growing up in a Mexican-American household, my childhood was saturated with the machismo and marianismo cultures. Hypermasculinity oozes brutality, control, and bad cologne. Placating and tongue-biting women don’t speak or act up, and always have rice and tortillas on the table at precisely 6 o’clock. Daughters are raised to submit to men, and are taught to fetishize purity and holiness. We are expected to feed stomachs, ego, and a taste for violence. With my work, I draw from my experience within this toxic culture and provide a call to action: for the women who don’t have a voice to feel empowered, and for the men with a little too much to say to be softened. The imagery I use within my work references the everyday accessible household items traditionally associated with my Mexican-American household: Fiesta spices, Fideo, prayer cards, candles, blankets, and tortillas. I want these items to be culturally and physically accessible. A visual language usually reserved for Abuela’s kitchen and living room is transformed into defiance, empowerment, and hopefully change. As we look toward the future, my work encourages women in my culture to find the strength to forget about the old traditions and raise their daughters to be independent.

Gabi Magaly is an emerging artist from Bryan, TX. Magaly received her BFA in photography at Sam Houston State University in 2015 and her MFA in Visual Arts at the University of Texas at San Antonio in 2020. Magaly has exhibited in solo shows at Satellite Gallery, Huntsville, TX; The Brick, San Antonio, TX; Presa House Gallery, San Antonio, TX; and Casa Lu, Mexico City. Her numerous group exhibitions include the Luis Leu Gallery, Karlsruhe, Germany; The Guadalupe Cultural Arts Center, San Antonio, TX; Masur Museum, Monroe, LA; Museo De Las Américas, Denver, CO; and New Texas Talent XXVII, Dallas, TX. She has been awarded two CAMMIE awards from Blue Star Contemporary and Luminaria Contemporary Cultural Center during Contemporary Art Month 2020. She works predominantly in the medium of photography, but also employs sculptural installation and embroidery. Magaly currently lives in San Antonio, TX, and works remotely at Diné College in Tsaile, AZ.

gabimagaly.com | @gabimagaly